In this piece from SheKnow.com, mother of 3, Jessica Migala, confesses that she has an alter ego named Gessica. (Yes, Gessica.) Gessica gets to do amazing things—like take solo vacations— if only in the theater of Jessica's mind. Why? Because Gessica does not have kids.
Can I just say how happy I am to hear this? It means I’m not the only one who one way ticket to kid-free fantasy town from time to time. Or every day. Or maybe once an hour. (Who’s counting?) And because there's always safety in numbers, it means I can shed some of the guilt that surrounds these daydreams like a wicked ass game of Ring Around the Rosie.
In a way, I think it's a survival mechanism, this kidless imagination. Because every time I let myself take a mental vacation and drift away into this make believe land free from diapers, stupid expensive daycare tuitions and endless lines of Hot Wheels cars threatening my sanity and my livelihood, I inevitably land back in real life, full of cuddly babies and hilarious four year-olds and little fat fingers wrapped around my own. And it's at these moments that I'm able to re-embrace my real life with a full heart.
Don't get me wrong, traveling alone not only sounds fun, it IS fun. I was fortunate enough to go on my own solo mission not too long ago. And it was truly fanfuckingtastic, not to mention medically necessary. But just like Jessica, there was more than one moment when "free me" mentally melted into a guilt-ridden, child-missing puddle of ooey gooey mom. And that's a good thing. Because dream as I might, I still wouldn't trade my kid-full life for anything.
Just don't tell that to Margo, my alter ego. She's scheduled to appear in my next kid-free fantasy in about t-minus 43 minutes. And she promised to have a cocktail waiting for me.
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